Am I the Problem? Why Your Passion to Help Others May Be Burning You Out
How can I serve others as a creative pro without forgetting to care for myself?
I think being a creative person comes with a kind of a curse.
Namely, a need to make the world better with our creative passions. That goal isn’t a bad thing. But when creative passion drives us to serve everyone and everything else but ourselves, it can burn us out.
A few times in my life, I’ve become my own worst enemy.
I’ll get jazzed up about a creative project.
I naturally want to make the project the absolute best it can be. I start to think of the person on the other end. I do everything I can to make their experience “perfect.” Sounds great until you realize the impossible task you’ve given yourself. Perfect isn’t a fair metric to judge anything.
Sometimes we put our creative blinders on and push forward anyway.
It can happen to any Creative at any time.
It hit me when I was just getting started.
My Time with the AIA
A few years out of college, I joined the local AIA.
The American Institute of Architects is a professional membership community of (you guessed it) Architects. Its mission is to improve the quality of the built environment through advocacy, education, and outreach.
I wanted to give back to my profession.
The AIA was seemingly the perfect way to do just that.
I didn’t have much experience.
I didn’t know many people in the community.
But I wanted to help.
So, when I had the opportunity to join the Board of Directors as an Associate Member, I jumped at the chance.
Buuuut.
Maybe I jumped a smidge too high.
Animal House
The first time I attended a monthly AIA Board Meeting, I realized I was the youngest person at the table. At that moment, I understood the AIA was built primarily for mid-to-late professionals.
But did it have to be? No.
I saw an opportunity for positive change.
In particular, I was interested in building a voice for young, emerging professionals (EPs) in my local community.
Through the AIA:
I created an Emerging Professionals Committee
I hosted Architect Exam Study Groups
I facilitated networking events
I got the message out there
We had a modest group of interested EPs, but it never felt like enough.
I kept pushing myself.
After a while, I asked, “What can I do that could help the EP community rally around design?”
So, without a second thought, I started a design competition geared toward EPs.
The focus — Animal Houses.
Yes, that’s correct. A competition to design habitats for any animal of the participants’ choosing. A fun idea and one I ran with hard.
Example Branding for The 2014 Animal House Competition
I designed logos.
I made flyers.
I printed cards.
I gathered jurors.
I found sponsors.
I spent hours and hours meticulously crafting the entire competition experience—from the branding to the submission process to the final reveal.
I remember thinking at one point, “If only I could make something fun like a design competition to inspire Emerging Professionals, more people would certainly get involved!”
After all that effort, we had 13 entries. Fun and innovative designs for Cats, Dogs, Chickens, Crows, Owls, and even Spiders.
Ultimately, I’m not quite sure what we gained out of it. In the moment, I hope the participants enjoyed the experience. But I think they would have even if I only made a quarter of the effort.
Maybe efforts like these add up over time. Maybe they don’t. It’s hard to know.
I’ve learned that it’s difficult to make long-lasting impact without help. I happily had taken everything on myself. But I didn’t realize how much time I was taking away from my wife, my other hobbies, and my everyday life.
No one asked me to make the Animal House competition, to set up the networking events, to host study groups. I just did.
It’s hard to say “No” to yourself when all you want to do is help make the world better in your own way.
How to Identify When You’re Your Own Worst Enemy
After all the effort to serve my community, I was slowly becoming the villain of my own story.
The only way to escape the vicious cycle of overserving is to stop and take a moment to reflect. Acknowledge there’s a problem. Then start asking questions.
Why am I doing this?
Who am I doing this for?
What does success look like?
When will it be good enough?
When will I be done?
When you think more about why you’re serving and how you’re going about it, you gain clarity for yourself about the choices you’re making.
You start to realize that it’s possible to set a standard for your creative efforts without compromising your vision. You can serve others and yourself. You need to be fair about what you can handle and what you can’t.
There will be other projects and other ways to share your creativity.
It’s more important to make an impact that can be replicated, adapted, and evolved than to burn yourself out in one go.
Final Thoughts
Looking back, I can make better choices about spending my creativity to help others today. Personally, I enjoy writing essays like these because I believe in the impact they have on those who read them.
|Maybe I needed to go through the gauntlet to realize my limitations. But if I could do it all over again, I’d remember one thing:
You don’t have to do everything yourself.
Seeking perfection may make you feel like you’re doing something meaningful in the moment, but it’s ultimately just another path to burnout.
Of course, go help make the world a better place. But don’t lose sight of yourself in the process.
TL;DR
How do you serve others creatively without burning out?
Creative service is easy. Stopping yourself from serving too much isn’t.
Set expectations for your craft so you don’t chase perfection.
Ask for help and share the effort to make change happen.
Learn from your projects and move forward.
Quote of the Week
Motivation for the days ahead of you.
“Doing too much for others (often at their own expense), many persons are more ‘human doings’ than ‘human beings.’”
— Louise Hart
That's all for now.
Stay creative, my friends—and have a great week!
